He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
