Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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