A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
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