I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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