Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Randomize
