Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I need a burrito and a hug.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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