well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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