I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
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