I need help removing her.
Ketchup is God's man juice
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Randomize
