Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
It's official drugs can't kill me
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize