Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Randomize
