I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Randomize
