But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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