There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
my liver is dry heaving
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
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