I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Randomize
