i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
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