I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Randomize
