yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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