so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
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