I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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