Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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