i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
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