You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize