i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
