it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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