Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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