He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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