I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
no. you can't hotbox the world.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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