Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
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