We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize