too bad you live with your parents still
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
