If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I'm sobbing to NWA
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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