I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
this will be a night to untag.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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