you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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