wrigley field is MILF paradise
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Randomize
