i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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