Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Randomize
