just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
