Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
