I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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