Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
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A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
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after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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