Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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