I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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