i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize