She said her name was "party"
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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