this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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