that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
We are all done wearing pants today
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Randomize
