Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
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