Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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