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• (818): View more from California

  Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"

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• (502): View more from Kentucky

  The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.

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• (469): View more from Texas

  you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator

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  19 Parents Admit the Lies They’ve Told Their Children

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (506): View more from New Brunswick

  I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms

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• (417): View more from Missouri

  New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.

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• (757): View more from Virginia

  Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.

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  21 Worst Confessions on a First Date

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (602): View more from Arizona

  You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.

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• (904): View more from Florida

  And my parents said I crawled through the house

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• (760): View more from California

  You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz

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