Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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